Are You Guilty of Using Subconscious Comparison Guidelines?

II Corinthians 10:12 says For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.

Do you constantly find yourself comparing yourself with others who may be more successful than you? I've been guilty of this measurement process quite often. You may have struggled with your weight, hair, or creating the perfect style. Perhaps you've had challenges with trying to duplicate speaking, acting, or walking a certain way only to discover that whoever you were comparing yourself with also had flaws and their way of being just didn't work for you.

The comparative analysis process does offer some benefits because we should never think that we are everything we should be and that there is no need for improvement especially when there are mentors in various sectors of society that can help us hone our skills and image presentation. However, comparing ourselves in an obsessive manner can prove to be detrimental to our well-being. By this, I mean you end up wasting time and energy trying to get everything right or perfect to gain other people's approval only to find out that they may not care as much about you as you care about them.

I'm sure you've heard the phrase "Keeping up with the Joneses," and you may have found yourself doing this without realizing how you have missed the mark. Your friends and family members may have told you and you dismissed their suggestions to change. As time passed, you may have realized that they were right, and now you don't know how to be yourself. On the other hand, you may not feel comfortable with yourself because of the negative words that were spoken to you when you were a child, while you were in an unsupportive marriage, work-related, or personal relationship. Oftentimes, we have the tendency to carry negative words with us longer than positive words. When we choose this route, we turn within and become focused on superficial aspects of ourselves which God never intended us to do.

Despite how much time you've wasted in following or mimicing those who are distinctly opposite of the image or calling God wants you to display and live out, it's not to late to change.  If you’re having a hard time accepting who you are and what you have to offer, here’s an opportunity to discover effective techniques you can use to overcome shame based and comparative behavior. Dr. Brene Brown has an audiobook that addresses alternatives you can use to resist feeling unworthy by focusing on the joys of your life.

Although God created everyone in his image, he created you with a unique persona. If you're struggling with the idea that you're unique, just think about all the people who are missing out on receiving your love, words of encouragement, help with daily activities, and presence because you're too busy chasing and supporting other people's success or dreams. Let's make today the beginning of embracing your worthiness. Make time to develop the gift or talent God gave you.